


Peter Parker and the Misadventures of Groupchat

by CommonSense001



Category: Avengers - All Media Types, Avengers: Infinity War - Fandom, Captain America - All Media Types, Marvel Cinamatic Universe (MCU), Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: 911 I’m getting angsty, Avengers IW compliant, BAMF Michelle Jones, BAMF Peter Parker, Father-Son Relationship, Fluff, Humor, Hurt/Comfort, Im still not ok, Light Angst, Multi, OT3, Parental Tony Stark, Peter Parker is Precious, Plot? In My Crack Fic?, Protective Tony Stark, Some Funny Chapters, Some Tagged Characters Will Not Show Up, Stony comes later, Tags to be added, Team Cap friendly, Team Cap is Confused, Tony Stark Has A Heart, groupchat au, it's more likely than you think, some serious chapters
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-07
Updated: 2018-10-14
Packaged: 2018-12-12 11:42:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,916
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11736342
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CommonSense001/pseuds/CommonSense001
Summary: > MJ changed their name to "idontcare"Ned: wowNed: matureidontcare: just change your name weirdoNed: f i n e> Ned changed their name to "Guyinthechair"————Or, peter decided to make several groupchats with his friends and family. It goes as well as you think.





	1. Just The Beginning

> _**PeterParker** created a New Group Chat_

_> **PeterParker** added **Ned** & **MJ** to New Group Chat_

 

  
**PeterParker** : Hey guys!!

**Ned** : Hey pete!

**MJ** : what is this

**PeterParker** : I just thought a group chat would be cool i guess :0

**MJ** : change the group name, it's lame.

**PeterParker** : you can change the name??

**Ned** : the three lines on the top left!

**PeterParker** : oh!! Got it!!

**MJ** : let me name the group

**PeterParker** : OK??

 

  
> _**MJ** renamed the Group Chat to « **Losers** »_

 

  
**Ned** : wow

**PeterParker** : you realize that you are also in this groupchat right??

**MJ** : yep.

**Ned** : okay then-

**Ned** : anyway! I got the new poe fighter jet with BB8 lego set today! You wanna help build it??

**PeterParker** : really?? Hell yes!!

 

  
> _**MJ** renamed the Group Chat to « **Nerds** »_

 

  
**PeterParker** : :(

**Ned** : >:0

**Ned** : i am a geek thank you!

**MJ** : whatever you say nerd.

**Ned** : :((

**MJ** : what's with the faces?

**Ned** : i'm showing my emotions

**MJ** : by doing “:(“

**Ned** : yep, at least thats something

 

> _**MJ** changed their name to “ **Idontcare** ”_

 

**Ned** : wow.

**Ned** : mature

**Idontcare** : just change your name, weirdo

**Ned** : f i n e 

 

> _**Ned** changed their name to “ **GuyInTheChair** ”_

 

**Idontcare** : really?

**GuyInTheChair** : what!?

**Idontcare** : nvm

**Idontcare** : hey, where did parker go?

**GuyInTheChair** : ??

**GuyInTheChair** : pete??

**Idontcare** :i stg of you are bailing on practice again i will cut you

**Idontcare** : …

**Idontcare** : p e t e r!

**GuyInTheChair** : i’ll call him

**Idontcare** : fine.

**Idontcare** : But if peter doesn’t pick up I have every right to change his name

**GuyInTheChair** : deal.

 

  
«……»

 

  
**Idontcare** : so?

**GuyInTheChair** : no answer :(

**Idontcare** : welp, time to brainstorm.

**Idontcare** : anyway, i’m gonna add people from the decathalon team here. So.

**GuyInTheChair** : wait. What?

**Idontcare** : might as well

**GuyInTheChair** : just make your own chat group!

**Idontcare** : why?

**GuyInTheChair** : just do it!

**Idontcare** : fine.

 

  
«……»

 

  
> _**Idontcare** created a New Group Chat_

_> **Idontcare** added **GuyInTheChair, PeterParker, FlashMoney, BettyBop, ComedicAffect, MissMoon, SAvril & 4 Others** to the groupchat_

_> **Idontcare** renamed group « **DADA Class** »_

 

  
**GuyInTheChair** : not everything is hp MJ

**Idontcare** : bite me about it

**Idontcare** : anyway, this is the Decathlon chat place or whatever.

**Idontcare** : but dont go crazy or i will block you

**FlashMoney** : a group chat? Really?

**Idontcare** : did i ask?

**BettyBop** : interesting…

**ComedicAffect** : ah! Now i can add comedic lines towards flash out of school as well!

**SAvril** : have fun with that abe, as long as we get _something_ done

**MissMoon** : when’s the next practice again??

**Idontcare** : next tuesday

**FlashMoney** : is _penis_ parker even going to show up next practice? He cant even reply to a text!

**GuyInTheChair** : shut it flash

**Idontcare** : i will block you

**FlashMoney** : no matter! Besides, the party will be lit!

**ComedicAffect** : that is false!

**MissMoon** : abe really

**ComedicAffect** : sorry!

**GuyInTheChair** : this was a great idea

**Idontcare** : it was your idea, genius.

**GuyInTheChair** : dont mock me

**PeterParker** : sorry! Internship! I’m here now; next tues is the next meeting then??

**Idontcare** : oh look you're not dead

**GuyInTheChair** : sweet

**FlashMoney** : hey! Penis Parker!

**PeterParker** : mj why

**Idontcare** : decathlon, parker

**Idontcare** : anyway, give me your phone im gonna change your name.

**PeterParker** : ok??

**GuyInTheChair** : mj please dont let it be a bad pun

 

_> **PeterParker** changed their name to **insertsciencejokehere**_

 

**Insertsciencejokehere** : mj please this name is way to long-

**Idontcare** : <<<

**Insertsciencejokehere** : :((

**FlashMoney** : just change your name to penis!

 

_  
> **Idontcare** removed **FlashMoney** from « **DADA** **Class** »_

 

  
**Insertsciencejokehere** : finally…

**GuyInTheChair** : you know we will have to add him back right?

**Idontcare** : oh well

 

  
«……»

 

_  
> **Insertsciencejokehere** created a new groupchat_

_> **Insertsciencejokehere** added **TStark, BinaryCoding, Widow, RhodeRunner, & KingPanther** to the groupchat_

_> **Insertsciencejokehere** renamed group « **FamChat** »_

 

  
**TStark** : Peter? What is this?

**Insertsciencejokehere** : Um

**Insertsciencejokehere** : a groupchat?

**TStark** : I know that.

**TStark** : But why?

**Insertsciencejokehere** : I thought it would come in handy

**Insertsciencejokehere** : besides, Nat thought it was a good idea…

**Widow** : I didn’t actually think you would do it

**Insertsciencejokehere** : oh

**TStark** : Fine just-

**TStark** : don’t blow up my phone.

**Insertsciencejokehere** : OK Mr Stark!!

**TStark** : it’s Tony, kid.

**Insertsciencejokehere** : right sorry

**RhodeRunner** : why am I here?

**Insertsciencejokehere** : because

**Insertsciencejokehere** : you’re cool

**Insertsciencejokehere** : i mean-

**Insertsciencejokehere** : so is Nat. And vision. And the Black Panther. And basically all the current and former avengers.

**RhodeRunner** : interesting. So Tony, is this kid like

**RhodeRunner** : your son? Or something?

**TStark** : no. Absolutely not. Why on earth would you think that?

**RhodeRunner** : I listened to peter on the phone with his friend and heard him call you irondad.

**TStark** : …

**Insertsciencejokehere** : mr stark im so sorry i just got excited while talking to ned and i just i dont know um

**Insertsciencejokehere** : mr stark?

 

_  
> **TStark** changed their name to **irondad**_

 

  
**RhodeRunner** : wow um.

**Widow** : i had a felling…

**Insertsciencejokehere** : …

**irondad** : what?

**irondad** : cmon son you instigated it first!

**Widow** : um, stark?

**RhodeRunner** : I think you broke him.

**Insertsciencejokehere** : Hi. Happy H. Here. Peter is having some… difficulties right now.

 

  
> _**Insertsciencejokehere** sent a photo_

 

  
**Insertsciencejokehere** : Is he choking? His face is red and he’s not moving.

**RhodeRunner** : yep. You broke him.

**irondad** : he’s fine Happy. Just embarrassed.

**Insertsciencejokehere** : !!!! Mr Stark!!!!

**irondad** : yes son?

**Insertsciencejokehere** : !!! You’re not helping!!!

**BinaryCode** : I Was unaware Stark had a son. And his son was Peter Parker.

**Widow** : nice going stark

**irondad** : what? I can have fun too!

 

  
«……»

 

  
> _**Insertsciencejokehere** reentered « **FamChat** »_

_> **Insertsciencejokehere** changed their name to **Bugboy**_

 

  
**Bugboy** : my other name was way too long

**irondad** : great, now we have two spiders.

**Widow** : have a problem with spiders, stark?

**irondad** : no no absolutely not, why would you think that?

**Widow** : good.

**RhodeRunner** : isn’t it ironic that we have two spider related people yet they both are afraid of spiders?

**irondad** : right?

**Bugboy** : you have no proof.

**Widow** : ^^^

 

_  
> **irondad** sent a video_

 

  
**Bugboy** : i

**Widow** : i will cut you if you don’t delete that video.

**irondad** : just exposing the truth nat!

**RhodeRunner** : wow.

**RhodeRunner** : you just bought yourself a deathwish Tones

**irondad** : its a funny video!

**Bugboy** : it was a serious situation! It was going to attack me!

**irondad** : sure kid

**RhodeRunner** : wait

**RhodeRunner** : how old are you?

**Bugboy** : gonna be 16 soon

**irondad** : still a kid

**RhodeRunner** : you brought a kid with us to fight in berlin against two super soldiers, a giant ant guy, a witch, a expert archer, and a guy with wings??

**irondad** : to be fair, i didn’t think that they would actually put up that much of a fight.

**Bugboy** : i can defend myself! I took down the Vulture without the suit mr stark made for me!

**Widow** : you’re still a kid though

**Bugboy** : >:(

**Irondad** : oh no, faces!

**Widow** : Tony…

**Irondad** : fine. Grownup time, kid!

**Bugboy** : what?! Cmon Mr Stark!

 

_  
> **Bugboy** was removed from the « **Famchat** »_

 

  
**RhodeRunner** : i cannot believe you Tones

**Irondad** : what? He’s safe; he has the suit! I put nearly every protocol i could think of into that suit!

**Widow** : he’s still a kid Stark

**RhodeRunner** : besides, with Ross and the accords, i don’t think its safe to have him out.

**RhodeRunner** : what if Ross decides he wants to make the kid sign the accords? He’s underage and he would be forced to come out as spiderman!

**Irondad** : ugh i hate it when you’re right.

**Irondad** : but telling him to not go on anymore patrols will make him suspicious and just be more reckless!

**Irondad** : he might end up not using the suit or taking out the tracker i just reinstalled.

**Widow** : reinstalled? He took it out?

**Irondad** : yep, him and his ‘guy in the chair’

**RhodeRunner** : huh. Smart kid.

**Irondad** : but selfless. Too selfless for his own good. Why do you think i gave him all those protocals? And safety features? And a parachute?

**Widow** : you did go all out didn’t you?

**Irondad** : yep

**RhodeRunner** : looks like tones has a heart afterall!

**Irondad** : so I have a soft spot for the kid? So what?

**Widow** : a soft spot? You called him son

**RhodeRunner** : and he called you dad

**Widow** : steve will never believe this.

**Irondad** : Natasha I swear if you tell steve about this

**Widow** : oh i won’t

**Irondad** : … Natasha…

**RhodeRunner** : ?

**Irondad** : Nat! Don’t you dare!

**Irondad** : Natasha!

 

_  
> **Widow** added **Capsicle, Winteriscoming, Inevermiss, Falcon, TicTac, Wand, & Bugboy **to « **Famchat** »_

 

  
**Irondad** : i hate you

**Irondad** : i have you so much

**Irondad** : i will never let this down.

**Widow** : :)

**Bugboy** : finally!

**Bugboy** : wait. You added team Cap to the groupchat?!

**Widow** : scroll up

**RhodeRunner** : this is a bad idea

**Bugboy** : !!!

**Capsicle** : ?

**Capsicle** : what is this?

**Falcon** : a groupchat i suppose

**Wand** : you suppose?

**TicTac** : my daughter and her friends do something like this!

**Falcon** : this is too weird.

**Inevermiss** : im getting too old for this

**Bugboy** : um!!

**Falcon** : im guessing “bugboy” is spider-kid?

**Widow** : spider-man

**Falcon** : right right

**Bugboy** : anyway-

**Bugboy** : You really care about me Mr Stark???

**Irondad** : shit

**Capsicle** : language, Tony, there is a kid present!

**Bugboy** : im 15

**Winteriscoming** : why am I here?

**Irondad** : you’re gonna find out eventually, just scroll up…

**Bugboy** : hold on a moment im freaking out this is amazing!!!

**Bugboy** : mr stark cares about me, i’m texting captain america and the winter soldier and the rest of team cap

**Bugboy** : and i just aced this algebra quiz!

**Falcon** : jesus tony you hired a kid to come with you and fight in berlin?

**Irondad** : ugh, sorry kid, grownup time again

**Bugboy** : aw come on!!

**Capsicle** : grownup time??

**Wand** : this is confusing.

**Inevermiss** : please explain what’s happening

**Winteriscoming** : ^^^

**TicTac** : ^^^

**Falcon** : ^^^

**Irondad** : this is your fault Widow.

 

_  
> **Bugboy** was removed from the « **Famchat** »_

 

  
**Widow** : :)

**RhodeRunner** : here we go again…


	2. Flash "I Read Spider-Man FanFics but I Don't Tell Anyone I do" Thompson

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Flashmoney: how amazing is this??!
> 
> > Flashmoney sent a document
> 
> Idontcare: wtf  
> Guyinthechair: is that a self-insert Spider-man fanfic?  
> Bugboy: holy shit  
> Flashmoney: FUCK WRONG CHAT

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> – Flash is a asshole but sometimes Assholes like superheros/vigilantes and read/make self-insert's ;)
> 
> — There needs to be more flash-loves-spiderman-fics so here yall go. Hope you enjoy!

>  ** _Flashmoney_** _entered DADA Class_

 

 **Flashmoney** : how amazing is this??!

 

> _**Flashmoney** sent a document_

 

 **Idontcare** : wtf

 **Guyinthechair** : is that a self-insert Spider-man fanfic?

 **Bugboy** : holy shit

 **Flashmoney** : FUCK WRONG CHAT

 **Comedicaffect** : The rumor come out, does Flash Thompson is gay?

 **Idontcare** : old meme

 **Idontcare** : but it works

 **Bugboy** : at first i wasn't sure if today would be a good day but this proves i was wrong

 **Flashmoney** : shut it parker!

 **Flashmoney** : seriously, why is your name bugboy??

 **Flashmoney** : you hiding something penis?

 **Bugboy** : um no?

 **Bugboy** : im also a fan of spider-man? I just don't post self insert fanfics about them to public groupchats

 **Comedicaffect** : shade has been thrown!

 **Bugboy** : shade??

 **MissMoon** : aw so sweet and innocent!

 **Bugboy** : :(

 **Guyinthechair** : i'll explain later pete

 **Idontcare** : are we ignoring the fact that Flash reads spider-man fanfictions?

 **Guyinthechair** : it depends, is it the fic by SpiderPool107? 

 **Idontcare** : yep.

 **Guyinthechair** : ah, my fav fanfiction writer

 **MissMoon** : same here ned!! I really like the one where Spider-man hooks up with DP!

 **SAvril** : that one is my favorite!

 **Idontcare** : wow the entire decatholon team are losers that read fanfiction about spider-man

 **Guyinthechair** : oh come on! Spiderpool107 is an AMAZING writer!

 **Bugboy** : wow

 **Flashmoney** : Deadpool?? Come ON Spider-man only deserves the best

 **Guyinthechair** : and that is??

 **Flashmoney** : its obviously me

 **SAvril** : oh my god flash

 **MissMoon** : like Spider-man would EVER date a 16 year old hes like

 **MissMoon** : 30 or something

 **FlashMoney** : uh no he's roughly 20! So by the time we get together he's 25! Hes the one who asked for MY help during homecoming!

 **Idontcare** : i swear to god flash… you all are idiots.

 **Bugboy** : this is so weird

 **ComedicAffect** : tell me about it.

 

* * *

 

> _**Bugboy** entered « **Nerds** »_

 

 **Bugboy** : ned why on earth do you read fanfictions about me??

 **Guyinthechair** : uh

 **Guyinthechair** : do i have to answer? 

 **Bugboy** : yes! It's really weird…

 **Guyinthechair** : yes yes i know its so weird but i

 **Bugboy** : ??

 **Guyinthechair** : ahh youll think im weird and it is weird and im just so!!

 **Guyinthechair** : ug why are words difficult even over text?!

 **Guyinthechair** : um… okok how about we head out for coffee around 3:00?? At That One Café?

 **Idontcare** : what am i? Chopped liver?

 **Guyinthechair** : oh, sorry mj! I just

 **Guyinthechair** : fuck it, do you want to come?? 

 **Idontcare** : i could care less but if youre paying

 **Bugboy** : alright, That One Café at 3:00 then?

 **Guyinthechair** : yep

 **Idontcare** : I guess

 **Bugboy** : see you guys then

 

* * *

 

> _**Irondad** sent a Private Message to **Bugboy**_

 

 **Irondad** : you ok kiddo?? Your heart rate is off the charts!

 **Irondad** : Please dont tell me your fighing a supervillan in a ferry again

 **Bugboy** : !!!

 **Irondad** : i dont understand punctuation talk kid

 **Bugboy** : ned just asked me and mj out !!!

 **Bugboy** : and not im swing through the city because im just so!!!

 **Bugboy** : happy!!!

 **Irondad** : wait. Your best friend led asked you AND your otherfriend mj out? 

 **Bugboy** ; its ned, but yes!! He did!!

 **Irondad** : okay then um care to explain??

 **Bugboy** : oh! Sure!

 **Bugboy** : so flash sent this really weird fanfic to the decath group chat by accident, and it was a spider-man self insert fanfic by "Spiderpool107" and apperantly more than half the kids in my decath group read fanfiction about spider-man? Even ned? So i was weirded out right? And i talked to Ned about it on our private group chat with mj and he told us to come to That One Café at 3:00 

 **Bugboy** : so when we got there i was still really confused about why he read spider-man fanfics? I wasn't judging or anything! It was just really weird. Ok maybe im judging by anyway

 **Bugboy** : we get our drinks and sit down and then Ned just upright said "You both are literally the coolest people i know and i dont even know if you guys are straight or gay or whatever but like i love you both more than bestfriends" before running out the cafe and down the street

 **Bugboy** : of course i chased him and we talked it out back at the cafe and learned we all liked eachother and that we were all pinning for eachother which strangely enough sounds like a fanfiction?? But then we all decided go on a date saturday and apparently we are considered a 'thing'

 **Bugboy** : so i guess we're all poly, oh and im bisexual btw byeeee

 **Irondad** : wait

 

> _**Bugboy** left the private message_

 

 **Irondad** : what

 **Irondad** : PETER

 

* * *

 

 

> _**Irondad** entered « **Fam Groupchat** »_

> _**Irondad** renamed the groupchat « **Does Peter Parker is Bi?** »_

 

 **Irondad** : why hello my dear friends

 **Rhoderunner** : Tony what the hell

 **Widow** : that's an old meme

 **Tictac** : hey! It's a good meme!

 **Widow** : didn't say is wasn't ant-guy

 **Tictac** : ant- _man_

 **Irondad** : Yeesh you're almost as bad as pete

 

> _**Bugboy** entered « **Does Peter Parker is Bi?** »_

 

 **Bugboy** : omg TONY

 **Irondad** : speak of the devil

 **Rhoderunner** : Tones don't embarress the kid too much

 **Bugboy** : this is the exact same meme abe did earlier

 **Irondad** : is that your boyfriend?

 **Bugboy** : no! 

 **Bugboy** : ned is!

 **Tictac** : whos ned?

 **Widow** : yeah whos ned

 **Nomad** : Whats happening here?

 **Irondad** : um

 **Irondad** : who are you?

 **Nomad** : me?

 **Rhoderunner** : um yeah

 **Nomad** : Its steve

 **Irondad** : OH

 **Bugboy** : oh my god

 **Tictac** : even I knew that stark

 **Irondad** : who are you?

 **Tictac** : low blow 

 **Nomad** : ok anyway, what does "does peter parker is bi?" Mean?

 **Widow** : oh yeah tony care to explain

 

> _**Irondad** sent (2)  screenshots_

 

 **Irondad** : theres your explanation

 **Bugboy** : tonyyyy

 **Widow** : aw young love

 **Rhoderunner** : poly what?

 **Nomad** : oh the original meme was does bruno mars is gay

 **Tictac** : aw the little spider is finding himself out! Are you out of the closet yet??

 **Bugboy** : i

 **Bugboy** : kinda

 **Irondad** : one question at a time starting with me; why didn't you tell me you where bi??

 **Bugboy** : oh um

 **Bugboy** : number one: Homophobia. number two: i had no idea if you would accept me or not and anxiety sucks

 **Irondad** : oh

 **Irondad** : i literally made out with steve one time i thought i told you that?

 **Rhoderunner** : wait

 **Bugboy** : w HaT

 **Widow** : i remember that

 **Nomad** : Tony! I though you said you wouldn't tell anyone! 

 **Tictac** : the plot thickens 

 **Bugboy** : ironman and captain america made out one time this is amazing i have to tell ned

 **Nomad** : peter NO

 **Irondad** : Peter yes

 **Bugboy** : :)

 **Nomad** : damn…

 **Irondad** : language!

 **Widow** : language.

 **Rhoderunner** : why did i just hear clint yell language from upstairs?

 **Tictac** : im confused

 **Bugboy** : me too.

 **Rhoderunner** : and you still have to explain to me about this whole poly-bi thing young man

 **Irondad** : ditto kid

 **Bugboy** : oh boy...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> • I have a feeling it's pretty obvious who Spiderpool107 is ;)
> 
>  
> 
> — OT3 is finally here!! Sorry if it was rushed, my writing is always better in my brain :( and I really wanted to upload this chapter!
> 
>  
> 
> — Peter is Bisexual and Trans; Tony is Pansexual; Ned is Bisexual; MJ is Panromantic Asexual; everyone else can be interpreted as you prefer; pan bi straight demi or aro/ace, its up to you ;0
> 
>  
> 
> — Anywho! The third chapter is already halfway done by now, And sorry about the wait for this one :'^ its my fault entirely for being lazy about writing. And before I forget, I am also making some more one shot and multichapter fics for SM:H ! Though some are still being written and others are being edited, I would appreciate it if you would read those when(if) I upload them!
> 
> [coughcough mostofthemaresongfics coughcough]
> 
>  
> 
> • sorry this is kinda short! I just wanted to get this chapter up! I'll fix any mistake i find


	3. That Awkward Moment When You Invite Your Bully Into Your Fam Chat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> > Bugboy added Flashmoney to «Does Peter Parker Is Bi?»
> 
> Bugboy: shit!  
> Nomad: language  
> Irondad: language!  
> Irondad: also, who's flash?  
> Widow: isn't this the kid who indirectly likes you?  
> Flashmoney: PARKER WHAT THE HELL

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> — most spelling errors are intentional!
> 
> — sorry this was s o late! But I’m back so hopefully I can continue this! Love y’all! Enjoy some minor angst :)

> **Bugboy** added **Flashmoney** to «Does Peter Parker is Bi?»

 

Bugboy: shit!

Nomad: Language

Irondad: Language!

Irondad: also, whos flash?

Widow: isnt this the kid who indirectly likes you?

Flashmoney: PARKER WHAT THE HELL

BugBoy: fUCK

 

> **FlashMoney** took a screenshot(2)! 

> **Bugboy** removed **FlashMoney** from «Does Peter Parker is Bi?» chat

 

Bugboy: fuck fuck fuck!!!

Irondad: peter calm down! Who was that?

Bugboy: he’s knows I’m Spiderman!! Shit!!

Nomad: calm down son, all he saw was the names

Bugboy: flash is stupid but he’s not that stupid!

Bugboy: he’s going to tell everyone!! I’m screwed! I have to protect aunt May and dhgrjdjsgeudjdg

Widow: I can hunt him down in three minutes.

Irondad: ok, no, we’ll do that later. We need to focus on protecting Pete’s identity

Widow: fine.

Bugboy: f hc lkkso I gotta go.

Irondad: Pete, don’t do anything rash, I’m on my way right now.

Widow: same here.

Nomad: i’ll contact the others just in case.

 

> **Bugboy** left «Does Peter Parker is Bi?»

 

Irondad: shit.

WhiteWolf: what’s everyone freaking out about?

Nomad: Bucky! You’re awake!

Widow: long but short story. Scroll up.

 

> **Irondad** renamed the chat «OPERATION HUNTDOWN»

 

Whitewolf: oh 

RhodeRunner: shit

 

* * *

 

> **Bugboy** sent a private message to **FlashMoney**

 

Bugboy: flash please dont

Bugboy: please don’t tell anyone

Bugboy: you didn’t see anything it was an accident.

Flashmoney: don’t what? Tell anyone you are fUCKING SPIDER-MAN?!

Flashmoney: LIKE HELL I WONT

Bugboy: flash please you don’t understand!

Bugboy: I have to protect my aunt! My friends fuck even YOU

Bugboy: if you tell anyone I’m Spiderman they’re a target! Do you understand! I can’t 

Bugboy: I can’t have anymore blod on my handbs olease I fucjing cant 

_read 10:08_

 

Bugboy: please.

Bugboy: please undertsbad 

_read 11:46_

 

Bugboy: flash please.

Bugboy: please respond I need to know if you told anyone.

_read 1:33_

 

Flashmoney: I deleted them

Bugboy: what?

Flashmoney: I deleted the screenshots. I didn’t tell anyone.

Bugboy: thankj you so much shandkekjs

Flashmoney: you’re such a baby. I’m not THAT heartless.

Bugboy: I didn’t mean to add you to that group chat 

Flashmoney: figure that much

Bugboy: what changed your mind?

Flashmoney: my selfless ness

Bugboy: :|

Flashmoney: and some persuading from some certain people…

Bugboy: … oh

Flashmoney: I didn’t know you ACTUALLY were serious about your internship thing and knowing Black Widow.

Flashmoney: she’s really scary.

Bugboy: tell me about it

Flashmoney: ... so you’re actually Spider-Man?

Bugboy: yep

Flashmoney: andyouknowIreadfanfictionaboutyoufuck

Bugboy: y e p

Flashmoney: do you know Deadpool?

Bugboy: nope

Bugboy: But mr Stark told me to stay away so

Flashmoney: oh 

Bugboy: yeah

 

Flashmoney: so do the webs come out of you?

Bugboy: what? No

Flashmoney: oh ok

 

Flashmoney: can you talk to spiders?

Bugboy: um no?

Flashmoney: alright

 

Flashmoney: are you venomous?

Bugboy: I don’t know?

Flashmoney: huh

 

* * *

 

> **Bugboy** entered « **Nerds** »

> **Bugboy**  added **FlashMoney** to « **Nerds** »

 

GuyInTheChair: um? Why is flash here??

IDontCare: didn’t he give you a panic attack?

Guyinthechair: and basically threatened to spill your identity??

Bugboy: well, yeah, but it’s fine now. 

Idontcare: I’m still going to punch him on Monday 

FlashMoney: wait what?

Bugboy: MJ no

Idontcare: MJ yes

Guyinthechair: MJ yes 

Flashmoney: do I get a say in this?

Idontcare: no

Guyinthechair: no 

Bugboy: no

Flashmoney: fair enough

Bugboy: Does this mean you’ll finally stop calling me penis Parker?

Flashmoney: maybe

Idontcare: two punches

Guyinthechair: i say three

Bugboy: guys n o

Idontcare: y e s

Guyinthechair: yES

Idontcare: babe he literally has been insulting you and harassing you since the fourth grade

Bugboy: and

Guyinthechair: ??

Idontcare: Babe I love you but you are way to nice sometimes

Bugboy: ?

Idontcare: shut up flash

Flashmoney: didn’t say anything! 

Idontcare: You were typing, it makes my iq drop every time

Flashmoney: :(

Idontcare: :)

Bugboy: MJ don’t be m e a n

Idontcare: or what?

Bugboy: no kisses and no free coffee dates!!

BugBoy: you too ned!

IdontCare: you wouldn’t dare

Guyinthechair: GASP

Flashmoney: ew 

Idontcare: eight punches

Flashmoney: WAIT

Bugboy: ok :)

Flashmoney: >:((

Idontcare: awe cute he uses faces too

Guyinthechair: he’s stealing out t h I n g

Bugboy: welp I guess this is a thing now

Guyinthechair: what?

Idontcare: what

Flashmoney: what?

Bugboy: nothing

Bugboy: :)

 

* * *

 

 

> **Bugboy** entered « **DADA Class** »

 

Bugboy: MJ !! I wasn’t serious about the punches!!

Idontcare: oops my hand slipped :)

Guyinthechair: awe she used a face!!

Bugboy: ok I forgive you <3

Flashmoney: WHAT THE FUCK

Idontcare: I still expect you to come to decathlon practice

Flashmoney: YOU BROKE MY NOSE

MissMoon: no excuses

 

* * *

 

 

> **Bugboy** entered « **Nerds** »

 

Bugboy: I’m going to be offline for the next few days, I’m going to wakanda on avenger business!!

Guyinthechair: that is so cool!!!

Idontcare: you better be back before the decathlon trip

Bugboy: love you too <3

Idontcare: <3

Guyibthechair: <3

Flashmoney: ew

Idontcare: 2 more punches

 

* * *

 

 

> **Guyinthechair** entered « **DADA** **Class** »

 

Guyinthechair: hey peter call me after your mission w/ the avengers! Hopefully your new suit enhancements are working ok! I bought a new Star Wars LEGO set !!

Bettyboop: um

MissMoon: ?

ComedicAffect: Wait.

Guyinthechair: w a I T

Guyinthechair: FUCK WRONG CHAT!

Idontcare: NED WTF

SAvril: IS PETER SPIDERMAN???

MissMoon: THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH!!!!

ComedicAffect: FLASH HAS A CRUSH ON PETER BAHAHAHHA

Flashmoney: fuck

 

* * *

 

> **Bugboy** sent a private message to **Guyinthechair**  

 

Bugboy: NED WHAT THE _FUCK_

 


	4. Sipping on Straight Chlorine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> To recap: Flash and the Decathalon Team found out about Peter being Spider-Man. Luckily, everyone has made an agreement to keep this fact hidden.
> 
> Up until now.
> 
> Peter returns from Wakanda after an altercation with Tony and the others about his age. He gets a little heated so the OT3 decide to investigate. 
> 
> Let’s just say . . . Things get hairy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So uh. It’s been 7 months since I last posted? Yeah sorry, school really sucks.
> 
> Anyway! I’ve finally recovered from Avengers IW and uh. Not to spoil anything but I’m totally gonna explore that with this fic.
> 
> Don’t worry! I’ll try to keep this as humorous as possible! But I’m sure that won’t last long.
> 
> I am so sorry for not posting!! Thank you guys so much for the positive feedback on my cringe writing because ,,,,, it’s pretty bad. You guys are the reason I’m continuing this ficlet!
> 
> Please enjoy my angst, I can’t help myself.

> _**Bugboy** reentered « **Nerds** »_

 

  
**Idontcare** : what are you doing here peter? I thought you had to do a ‘ _intern thing_ ’ in wakanda with The Avengers?

 **Guyinthechair** : yeah dude, what happened?

 **Bugboy** : _me being 15 happened._

 **Idontcare** : woah, italics, its that serious.

 **Flashmoney** : care to elaborate??

 **Bugboy** : ugh

 **Bugboy** : everyone just keeps calling me a kid and leaving me out of things!

 **Bugboy** : even worse, they’re about me

 **Bugboy** : not steve not bucky not ross

 **Bugboy** : but me. They keep calling me a kid and are acting like i cant defend myself or handle anything! its kinda like they're hiding something…

 **Idontcare** : wow. Thats tough dude.

 **Flashmoney** : aw man dude. That sucks

 **Guyinthechair** : but did you get to talk to team cap??

 **Idontcare** : ned. Not a good time.

 **Guyinthechair** : right. Sorry.

 **Bugboy** : yeah… but like

 **Bugboy** : i wish they could just trust me enough. I never even got to really read over the accords! I was kinda just, forced to go to berlin… which is strange…

 **Idontcare** : ??

 **Idontcare** : so you never read or signed the accords? Why the hell were you dragged into the fighting then?

 **Guyinthechair** : what if tony was scared that you would pick cap’s side instead of his?

 **Bugboy** : holy crap

 **Flashmoney** : that ,,,actually makes sense. Nice one ned.

 **Bugboy** : wait, if i hadn’t signed the accords but im still a hero vigilante… why haven’t i been forced to do so already?

 **Bugboy** : wouldn’t they have put me in that jail thing tony mentioned once?

 **Idontcare** : jail thing??

 **Guyinthechair** : i mean, i guess. Secretary Ross was pretty clear in his statement with the accords…

 **Bugboy** : yeah, its called the _raft_ or something im really not sure. I overheard tony talk about it one day and apparently its in the middle of the ocean underwater with reinforced cells that not even wanda can break out of. But steve and bucky eventually broke them out after Mr stark came back from a weird snowy place…

 **Flashmoney** : that’s a awful lot of strange information

 **Guyinthechair** : Thats so  _coool!!_

 **Idontcare** : it says here that on the Accords that “—Any hero or vigilante activity not granted permission to prosecute crime in any fashion and didn’t sign the accords made by the UN will result in said persons’ arrest and/or retirement. Whether it be mutant, artificial, robotic, eta…”

 **Bugboy** : holy hell…

 **Guyinthechair** : so, every time peter goes out on patrol and kicks ass he’s breaking the law given but the UN??

 **Idontcare** : yep.

 **Guyinthechair** : awesome

 **Bugboy** : no! Not awesome! I mean, kinda, but this means i could get arrested!

 **Guyinthechair** : you could sign the accords

 **Idontcare** : cant, petey-pie is underaged.

 **Bugboy** : why the hell did mr stark not tell me this?

 **Idontcare** : who knows? Maybe he was keeping it from you to protect you or something cliché like that.

 **Bugboy** : that probably explains why the UN hasn’t attempted to restrain or arrest me

 **Flashmoney** : maybe they’re waiting for a falling out between you and ironman!

 **Guyinthechair** : oh! Or maybe they’re waiting for you to turn 18?

 **Idontcare** : whatever it is, i don’t like it.

 **Bugboy** : yeah, me too…

 **Guyinthechair** : guys…

 **Bugboy** : what?

 **Guyinthechair** : turn on the news…

 **Idontcare** : crap

 **Bugboy** : shit

 **Flashmoney** : holy fuck

 

          •        •        •        •        •

  

_> **Private Message** from **RhodeRunner** to **Irondad**_

**RhodeRunner** : so ... want to talk about wakanda?

 **Irondad** : ...

 **RhodeRunner** : you know you cant keep Peter in the dark forever, right?

 **Irondad** : i know. I just…

 **Irondad** : he’s so young and… i want him to grow up at least semi-normal! He has mutant arachnid powers! And he’s a total nerd which, granted, is actually amazing and funny; but gets him bullied and i just… i cant get the kid mixed up in this.

 **RhodeRunner** : once Secretary Ross finds out, he’s gonna be pissed

 **RhodeRunner** : and peter is going to take the fall out for it

 **Irondad** : fuck, you don’t think I don’t know that?

 **Irondad** : he’s the closest thing i got to a son since i cant have kids anymore

 **Irondad** : god im getting old 

 **RhodeRunner** : you’re not that old tones…

 **Irondad** : yeah, but pepper left and i just

 **Irondad** : i just want to protect him, you know?

 **RhodeRunner** : we all do.

 **RhodeRunner** : but soon, “grownup time” isn’t going to cut it anymore. You need to tell him now before he figures out the hard way.

 **Irondad** : too late.

 **RhodeRunner** : What?

 **Irondad** : turn on the news.

 **RhodeRunner** : _fuck_

  

         •        •        •        •        •

         

_> **Private** **Message** from **Irondad** to **Bugboy**_

 

 **Irondad** : peter please tell me you're not out patroling

Irondad: peter please

Irondad: secretary ross is going to catch you. I don’t want you to end up in prison or forced to reveal your identity!

Irondad: peter!

Irondad: i know i havent been treating you like a adult but youre still a teenager and im just trying to protect you!

Irondad: im sorry. please text me.

 

         •        •        •        •        •

  

> Private Message from Bugboy to Auntmay

 

Bugboy: stay at work, dont come home. 

Auntmay: peter, what's going on?

Bugboy: watch the news, tony will call you im sure. Im with Ned and MJ, i'll be ok i promise

Auntmay: Is this about the secretary of state? And the Accords? 

Bugboy: i love you, i'll call you later

 

> Bugboy left the chat

 

Auntmay: peter! 

 

         •        •        •        •        •

  

> Idontcare added Irondad and Auntmay to «Nerds»

 

Idontcare: tony i swear if you dont start explaining whats up with sec ross and the accords i will drive upstate myself and personally give you a peice of my mind

Guyinthechair: mj please, be reasonable

Auntmay: ok i dont understand whats happening! 

Guyinthechair: secertary ross is in queens and he's after peter 

Auntmay: is he with you?

Idontcare: no? Why?

Irondad: because he isn't asnwering any calls or texts!

Auntmay: he just texted me that he was with mj and ned, are you sure he's not there??

Idontcare: what the hell. Of course he's not here. I don't know where he went, he just left the chat and i haven't heard from him since! 

Irondad: ok ok, explain what happened.

Guyinthechair: i flipped on the news and told them to turn it on and ross was there saying that the search for mutants and more specifically, Spider-man, was going on!

Idontcare: then peter suddenly made some excuse and just left without saying where he was going.

irondad: maybe ross was tapping into his phone to find his location.

Auntmay: that makes… sense i suppose, what are we going to do if we cant find him?

Irondad: I don’t know.

guyinthechair: wait. Hey, MJ?

Idontcare: what Ned?

guyinthechair: where’s flash?

 

         •        •        •        •        •

  

NEWS ALERT!

     Many witnessess say that a fifteen year old boy was taken away from his apartment in Queens by Secretary Ross and his Personal Guards before being held for questioning about the Friendly Neighborhood Spider-man! Could this be linked to the Accords? Who exactly is this teen and what are Ross' intentions? More at 5!

 

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         •.       •.       •.       •.       •

 

> Bugboy sent a private message to ‘Idontcare’

 

Bugboy: they have flash.

Idontcare: Peter. What happened. Where are you?

Bugboy: they’re going to hurt him and this is all my fault fkfhfhf

Idontcare: Pete. Hey, listen to me. You did nothing wrong. Flash won’t say anything, ok? He promised he wouldn’t, remember. Ross would never hurt him.

Idontcare: I need you to tell me where you are.

Bugboy: i

Bugboy: MJ.

Idontcare: what is it Pete?

Bugboy: please believe me.

Bugboy: I’m. kind of at a wizards house?

Idontcare: 

Idontcare: Peter you better be fucking serious. We don’t have time to be messing around.

Bugboy: I’m serious! 

Bugboy: he said he can help me. He can help us!

Idontcare: I’m calling tony, he’s going to track you and dig you out of whatever hole you dug yourself.

Bugboy: ok. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

Idontcare: what?

 

Idontcare: PETER WHAT THE FUCK

Idontcare: WHO HE HELL IS IN MY ROOM? WHERE DID HE COME FROM?

Bugboy: MJ...

 

 

> Bugboy created a new Group Chat!

> Bugboy added (6) people to the chat!

> Bugboy renamed the chat ‘I Can Explain’

 

Bugboy: ok. So I have some explaining to do.

Irondad: Peter where the fuck have you been?

AuntMay: Pete, are you ok? And if you are, you are grounded!

guyinthechair: babe!! MJ just texted me and she was freaking out!! What’s happening?

Bugboy: so ,,,,,,, there’s this

Bugboy: ,,,,,, wizard?

Irondad: ... what.

SorcererSupreme: allow me to introduce myself. My name is Dr. Stephen Strange. I believe our friends Peter and Flash here have gotten themselves into some trouble; so I proposed a bargain.

Irondad: oh. Hell no.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trench is giving me uh..  
> Inspiration
> 
> So, we introduced Doctor Strange! Finally, I love him sm. And uh, yeah flash is in a sticky situation right now.  
> Not everything is going to be infinity war compliant, just a heads up.
> 
> Also, this wasn’t as angsty as the next chapters after the whole flash thing will be.  
> Just a heads up ;)
> 
> I hope you enjoyed!

**Author's Note:**

> Im not good with keeping a schedual or coming up with names :'^ if you have better name suggestions then comment below! I might use or cycle through some of them :)


End file.
